Monday, December 28, 2009

The Look In The Eyes

Haven't posted anything in a while, so I'm puttin this one on, with the caveat that maybe this might not be the best venue for this voice. But, here you are.

More rock to come, my international friends.

Hope you enjoy.

The Look in the Eyes

The Man looked at The Lady from a little bit above her. The Lady said “I know what that means. I can see that look in your eyes.”

She wondered what she could see in His Eyes. Alls she could see were just eyes.

“I know what that means. I can see that look in your eyes.”

What look? What was in the eyes? Alls she saw was a look. And eyes. She looked as close as she could to see the look. In the eyes. But alls she saw was just eyes. Pretty eyes? Was that what was ‘the look’?

“Elzie, Honey. We have to go. Shut the T.V. off. Time to get ready.”

Her Mom had the peaceful nature of a lawnmower over the carpet, ironing in her bra and skirt, scuffling to get ready.

“C’mon. Here you go.”

She picked Elzie up like a koala and took her up to her room.

“OK. One armie in…”

Elzie was compliant. One army in. Nother army in. Now both army, both armies are in.

“There we go,” her Mother heaved with a sigh. “You ready?”

She wanted to know what the look meant. She wanted to know what was inside of the eyes, besides just the eyes. She looked at her Mom as hard as she could, in they eyes. Do you look at the black part? Do you look at the eyelashes? What part tells you what That Look Means?
The Mean Teacher Lady was there and seemed to be as hard as the piano seat. Hard and unshufflable. Unpronounceable. Un-doable. The Lady With the Clipboard was a bumblebee saying names.

“Elzie? Elzie Dunn you are up next. Elzie, like ‘Elzie Fitzgerald?”

Elzie Fitzgerald. What a dumb name.

She walked out on the clickity clock stage and took the liquid looking flat black bench and slid around until she could at least reach the keys ok. Mmm k. The middle finger goes on the black key like this. Uh kay.

She started. But the keys were thicker, they were heavier than her normal piano. They were like walking heavy dogs. The heavy dogs kept wanting to lie down but she had to keep playing them. She had to press really hard to get the dogs to play the note. Dumb dogs. Stupid seat you can’t even sit in. Stupid black and white. The sound was thicker than she knew. She didn’t like it. It sounded hollow in the school auditorium. Audio-torium. Come on, dogs. Don’t be so dumb. Note after note thicker and thicker, until the dogs started licking her fingers. What does it mean, inside of the eyes? Do you change your eyes? How do your eyes change?

“I know what that look means. I can see it in your eyes. I love you too.”

How can she see the Love? Is it in the part in the eyes? Which part?? How do you see it? What does Love look like? If you scratch the eyes, can you get the love part out? Can you just hold the eyes in your hand and see the loving part? Where is the loving part? Is it in the eyes? How come she couldn’t see it? She looked and looked, and all she saw were eyes. She saw frantic, darting eyes. She saw eyes that wouldn’t look at her. She saw eyes that were too busy. She saw eyes that saw something else, something around, something behind her, something in the way, not her but something around it, but she never saw into the eyes. She wanted to see into the eyes. Where in the eyes do you look?

She finished the ending chord and stared at the keys. Can’t even reach the pedal. Stupid dogs. Slow dogs. Lazy dogs. Hateful dogs. I wonder what’s in their eyes, she thought.

The Clipboard Woman came over and spoke to her.

“Elzie, take a bow!”

Elzie stood up, still angry at the black and white key dogs and the pedal so far away. And courteseyed. It was hard to courtesey like her Mean Lady Teacher had told her with her shoes from her sister. But the shoes were pink and her dress Both Armies In was blue so the shoes had to come too. She looked over and saw the Mean Lady Teacher and saw something. It wasn’t happy because one time she and Misty both licked an ice cream at the same time and met tongues and giggled so hard they didn’t know when to stop, and that was happy and so that wasn’t it but it wasn’t sad either even though Mean Lady Teacher kind of had red eyes. Is that the look? Is that what love looks like? It was something she didn’t know. How come the eyes can do so much? Alls she did was try to put her fingers on those keys that would not play, thank you very much.

Afterward in the hallway she ate her treat that tasted like milk but frozen and was supposed to be chocolate but Elzie was pretty sure this paper cup didn’t know what chocolate was supposed to taste like. Her Mom got down and looked Elzie In The Eye.

“I am so proud of you, Honey. So. Proud.”

Proud. Hmm. The Prouders That Be. Proud. Elzie wondered if that was like walking heavy dogs? Or was it like when you catch a moth in a jar? Or was it like when you break your pencil taking the test but you chew off the wood to get the lead part back so you can keep taking the test? Or was it like when you get both Armies in? Maybe The Look in the Eyes could tell.

“Elzie!”

Gahhhh, Missess Gallaalaaway. Allaalaaways in my face.

“Elzie. That. Was. A. Mag. Nificient. Beethoven.”

Elzie nodded and wished someone would take the melting milk from her hand and also the paper part which didn’t taste as good as the paper promised it would look.

“Really.”

And Missess Gallaalaaway had a look in her eyes that was wet and red too.

Elzie quietly said thank you and chewed on her wooden spoon tasting of frozen milk that didn’t even taste like chocolate. And smiled. She felt like the situation could use a smile.

Elzie watched her mother’s legs in her skirt and shirt that shirt that took longer than even Elzie to get ready.

Beethoven, Elzie thought looking up to the lights in the ceiling.

I wonder if he knows what Love looks like. In the eyes.

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